Ifemelu’s Relationships and her Journey to America

     One character trait I noticed in Ifemelu is how hopelessly desperate she is for love. She immediately considers them potential mates in multiple interactions with male characters. For instance, she felt instantly connected to Obinze romantically after spending only a few hours with him. “They had known nothing of each other only hours ago, and yet, there had been a knowledge shared between them in those moments before they danced, and now she could think only of all the things she still wanted to tell him, wanted to do with him” (Adichie, 61). In addition, when Blaine had movers transporting his school stuff to another building, Ifemelu was thinking of something entirely different. “She began to imagine what he would be like in bed” (Adichie 93). When talking about another boy, Osahon, she again references romantic feelings toward her. “I’m just curious about him.” Ifemelu is very horny throughout the book. Maybe she was trying to replace what she had with Obinze. 

This relationship Ifemelu has with men is in stark contrast to her relationship with women. Because Ifemelu’s mother was not involved in her life, she leaned on stronger female figures for advice and support growing up. Her relationship with Aunty Uju influenced her life the most. “It was Aunt Uju who sewed Ifemelu’s little-girl dresses and, as Ifemelu got older, they would pore over fashion magazines” (Adichie, 53). Additionally, they both leaned on each other in America when each struggled. Furthermore, Obinze’s mother acts as another mother figure to her. “Ifemelu is like a daughter to me” (Adichie, 97). No matter where Ifemelu went, she always had a strong female figure to guide her. 

Now, I will analyze the differences and similarities between Ifemelu and Obinze’s experiences in the United States versus Great Britain. In both instances, they started at high-risk, low-income jobs- Obinze cleaning toilets and Ifemelu working for the tennis coach as a “prostitute.” Another similarity includes using their network of friends and peers to gain new opportunities. For instance, Ifemelu used her connection with Ginika to get her babysitting job with Kimberely, while Obinze was granted a fake visa through his connections. In the end, Ifemelu found more success with her blog and editing job in America, while Obinze struggled to climb the social ladder. He got deported while Ifemelu chose to return to Nigeria.